Me and Religion

I was born and raised Catholic, although my family didn't really practice. I went to Catholic school, but I wasn't much into the religion. I never doubted that there is a God and that Jesus is His Son, I just didn't like some things with Catholicism in general. I've always been suspicious of the whole Pope thing, and I don't like confession (I don't think I need to use a priest to confess my sins to the Lord and repent). I don't like that I can't be a priest. But I prayed every day because I wanted that connection. When I was confirmed, the bishop or monsignor or whoever that came to train us one day told me that I had a special connection with God, and I took that to heart.

When I went to college, God sort of smacked me over the head, telling me to get myself to church. I was kind of thinking about it anyway, but then when I was starting to volunteer at the hospital I met a priest who scolded me and told me to go to the church near campus. I told him I would, but didn't think much of it. Until a week or two later, when I ran into him and the priest of the campus church at an event I was helping with. That priest gave me his card with the mass times on it and told me he would see me on Sunday. So I got involved with the Newman Center Catholic church and student group and really enjoyed it. I still didn't agree with some stuff with the church, but I felt very comfortable there and it was good. When I went to GVSU I found a church I liked in Grand Rapids, and I went with some friends. There was a great church that I was starting to get involved with at Iowa State. That church was very liberal, actually. Anyway, when I came to St. Joe I started going to a church. I even became a member. But I quickly decided that I was very uncomfortable there. I couldn't put my finger on it, exactly. It just didn't really feel right. So I stopped going, and pretty much disaffiliated from the Catholic Church. Well, it's not like a sorority or fraternity, there's no technical disaffiliation paperwork or anything. I just decided that I don't really fit with the religion. I started researching other religions. What I was really interested in was finding a more liberal belief. If you haven't figured it out by now, I am an ally to the Gay, Lesbian, Bi-Sexual, Transgender, etc., community. I feel very strongly that we are all God's children and we all deserve a place at His table. But it's not easy finding a religion that also believes this.

However, in my research I found that there are some denominations where individual church communities more or less govern themselves and can adopt more liberal beliefs. The Episcopal church is interesting. There is all sorts of controversy there. The church is splitting over the issue. I think it's great that they are moving in that direction, but I couldn't get a feel for where the church here in St. Joe stands on GLBT rights. So I didn't try them. The United Church of Christ tends to be pretty liberal, and has a program for it's parishes to become "Open and Affirming", meaning they welcome members of the GLBT community. Unfortunately, the church in St. Joe was without a pastor for a while, and I couldn't get a feel for where the congregation stood on the issue. I also was nervous to go because of the no pastor thing. So I didn't go.

Last semester we finally started a "Safe Zone" program on campus (a training for people to go through to become support allies for the GLBT community) and I attended. At this training was the pastor for one of the Christian churches in town. I was extremely impressed. He was there with a faculty member, who it turns out is one of the church Elders. My friend Sandy was also at this training, and she told me that she went to that church and told me that they are a very open and welcoming community. I told her I might have to check it out. Then a few weeks later I saw a commercial for the church, which said the same thing. So I figured that was God's way of telling me to get my butt back to church.

I went, and was really impressed with how open to diversity they were in general. It was MLK day weekend, and the sermon was about equality and such, and they were doing community outreach and protest marches and stuff later that day and the next. I put in a card asking for more information, and the pastor called me and invited me to coffee to chat. He told me more about the church, which is a branch of the Disciples of Christ. It really is a welcoming environment (I've been welcomed by most of the congregation, it seems), and definitely open to everyone, no matter who they are. It's really cool. I have missed the past few weeks for various reasons, but I still like them and will go back when I can. What is funny, though, is that it makes me miss the Catholic mass. When I leave here, I may try out Catholicism again. Well, I really should. I'm going to be Gracie's Godmother, when she gets baptized. If Carol can ever find a time when she can do it. I know part of my responsibilities is to help bring her up in the Catholic church. And I will do that, no matter what church I go to personally. I'll take her to the Catholic mass when I'm home. I'm not about to stand before God and everyone and say that I will do that, and then not do it. But I won't discourage her from exploring other options when she gets older, either.

So that is my religion story. I tell it because it's a good lesson that if you want to find a spiritual home, you just need to look for it. They are out there. I still don't feel fully connected, but I'm getting there. It's just a part of me that I let go for a while, kind of like my weight. So while I work to lose weight, I'm working on my relationship with God. And that's that. Now that I've laid that foundation, I can tell you another thing I'm working on, but it's getting late, so that will have to wait for another day.