Dreams

So last night while I was discovering that my suits look terrible on me and I have nothing to wear to job interviews my television background noise was a show on Discovery Health called "In Your Wildest Dreams". This lady talks to people who keep having recurring dreams and interprets them, then the people resolve their issues and start having other dreams. I've always been fascinated with dreams, I've done a couple of papers and a science experiment on them even. I have really vivid and sometimes odd dreams and I remember a lot of them. I still remember one I had when I was little. 

So anyway, I am having recurring dreams where I am part of the Mythbusters build team (Kari, Grant and Tory), but they don't know that I'm part of the team, they just think I'm a kid who is hanging around to run errands for them and stuff. Last night they were shocked to discover that I am 31 years old--they thought I was 12. Once they knew how old I was they started seeing me as part of the team, but by then I was like, hey, I'm just here for fun and stuff.

My interpretation of this dream is that I don't feel like I'm ready to move up. I always felt weird when I was FYP Director, when we had Directors' meeting I always felt like I shouldn't be there, like I'm too young. Heck, the Provost even said at one point that I was young. And I know this will sound stupid, but I feel like I'm too short to be a real boss lady. When I was looking at myself in the suits I have, I said to myself, I look like I'm playing dress up, and I'm too short to be in charge of anything. So let me rephrase my first sentence--I know I'm ready to move up, I have the skills, experience, and desire to move up and on, and I'll be very successful. But I feel too young and short for it! It's dumb! So I think my subconcious is telling me that I'm paranoid that my new people will think I'm too young. Maybe I'll wear my makeup in such a way as to accentuate my wrinkles...

Oh, and in case you were worried, I did figure out suit solutions. Thankfully I'm kind of obsessed with jackets, so I had a couple that I could pair up with some pants and shirts. I no longer look like I'm playing dress up. I'm gonna look good!